Maladie

Well, i got to confess the hardest part was to take the decision to make this art.
If someone didn't recently psy me and told me i should do it, i would probably never have the will to draw my disease representation.
This fucking bitch took me around 6 years of my life now. So i can barely look at it most of times. Im really glad to be finished with this paint.
"Maladie" means in french a condition, a sickness/illness or a disease. And i call it like that when i speak about it.

You may think there are lot of reference merged in there, but i did put each thing for a specific purpose. I could have let you guess but here is how i imagined it.

- The perfusion perch Maladie is holding : Maladie is aiming and empaling me for its location (my kidnees and digestive system).
- Perfusion linking : The treatment i recieve is linked to both me and "Maladie". It may hurt Maladie and help me to get better, but sometimes clearly the opposite.
- Maladie's closed eyes : I think diseases are blind, whether your wealth, your race, your karma, your actions. Sometimes you are not deserving that shit and that's the most infuriating.
- Maladie's mouths : Its hunger got no limits, never think the worst part is when you are just hit. Maladie could and will take you everything if you are not fighting.
- Multiple faces : Cliche but noneless very true, a serious disease got many faces : Physical injuries, and biology sure but let's not forget mental injuries (traumas), strengh loss, body becoming weaker, able to do less stuff, moral & psychology destroyed, your will disapearing, your dreams sliping away, your self-confidence toward daily stuff, your closest people doubting you, you social circle collapsing, your future becoming a thick fog.
- Some suffering faces : The ugly expressions of these remember me my worst crises... Inbelievable amounts of pain. There are actually my worst fear in life... see them again.
- Some stitches to graft one and other limb : A severe illness is complete and strongly balanced when all its side effects reached you (kinda the same meaning as the multiple faces).
- A laughing face : Sometimes it was so rough i felt like it was a joke, like if something was planning this in the shadow and mocking of everything that was snatched to me.
- Unhealthy anatomy : well that's logic
- Long proportion, multiple limbs, multiple tongues : Disease can grab you anywhere you are, you won't going out of it easily.
- Crown and Perch Scepter-like : Maladie is the one that rule in our couple, in my life. Like a king on his subject.
- Hourglass with blood instead of sand : The death is never too far, I often got the feeling a clock is running, my life being sucked way faster than healthy people.
- Jewelry : It is a true fact i tossed so many money on that bitch already. i could have easily bought the last stereo surround setup i always dreamt about and a new car.
- Medication & drugs : I consumed so much for it in the 6 past years. you got no choice and it's really sad to ingest all these chemicals when you think about it. You end to fear that much but let's be clear you cannot pass on them if you wanna keep living in a decent way.
- Teeth & bones hanged at its belt : There are its trophies, i often think to those who already passed because of it. In french there is an expression to say you got dead trampled by something "you lost your teeth here"
- The pillow it is sat on : She is perfectly comfy with the actual situation, i am definitly not.
- The chain Maladie is fermely holding linked to my hand : It forbid me every day to do what i want, mostly drawing like i would.
- I am drawing this art : Loop stuff, to put you in my spot, actually to initiate an empathy feeling
- The place where i and Maladie stand : there is nothing here but me and Maladie, no one to help, no one to be hear, and the horizon seems empty

Please keep in mind i really don't wanna brag about "a cool art" showing off my "badass illness" and complain about how much rain is on me.
I just wanted to express some hard feelings i daily barely let go. I know i am far to be alone, more than that this is threatening everyone of us at some point of our lives.
This picture is not exagerated and i thought may be if i could hit some people with its violence...They will possibly keep in mind that these crazy shit really exists out there, that they got plenty faces and that's why we need to spread around us the more love we can.

Sorry for the long talk

(Blood minimized to avoid mature content)